By: Deborah Hill LCSW (Ret.)
I have a demon that sits on my shoulder. Its name is They.
I didn’t realize it was there for years, but it’s been whispering to me all along—
They won’t like that. They think you’ll fail. They said it can’t be done.
It’s insidious, cunning, even charming. And it’s a liar.
Perhaps, you’ve encountered this demon as well. I’ve seen it cling to friends, family, and clients. I often recognize its voice in others before I hear it in myself. It’s sneaky like that.
The demon “They” is a master of disguise. It whispers through the voices of others:
“You’re wrong. You’re worthless. Everyone thinks you’re a joke.”
It can play pitcher and batter in the same game—stirring conflict, self-doubt, and shame.
But here’s the truth: there is no demon. It’s your inner voice telling you these things, and if you are not careful, that voice will convince you to think, say, or do just about anything.
So how do you fight back?
- Identify the voice within. Notice when thoughts shift, when shame creeps in, when lies feel like truth. It may have started out as someone else telling you these things, but now it’s you.
- Refuse to obey. You have a choice. Don’t swallow every voice that speaks.
- Replace the lies. Speak truth aloud. Write it on notes. Practice love toward yourself. Do it daily. Do it loudly.
- Choose your people. If others live by their demons, either strengthen your armor—or walk away.
Because in the end, the demon They only wins if we forget the source.
Deborah Sickle Hill 