Eliminate the Worrywart: Understanding and Managing Everyday Anxiety

Eliminate the Worrywart: Understanding and Managing Everyday Anxiety
By Deborah Hill, LCSW (Ret.)

“I had a big presentation today and was up all night worrying.”
“I’m running late again—I’m afraid I’ll lose my job.”
“I’m so worried about Jim’s health, I can’t eat.”

Sound familiar? We all worry. But chronic worry is more than emotional discomfort—it’s a contributor to high blood pressure, digestive issues, insomnia, and even long-term health breakdowns. Some people literally worry themselves sick.

Worry Is an Illusion of Control

Worrying often feels like doing something—but it’s really just a poor attempt at control. When we worry, we unconsciously think:

• “If I think hard enough, I can stop something bad from happening.”
• “If I don’t worry, I’ll be unprepared or uncaring.”
• “If I mentally run every possible outcome, I can force the right one.”

None of that is true. A woman worrying in the waiting room during her husband’s surgery isn’t helping him heal—she’s draining her own energy. If she took a walk, grabbed coffee, or talked with a friend, the outcome wouldn’t change—but her resilience to face it would improve.

Worry = Self-Induced Stress

Unlike external stress (deadlines, illness, difficult people), worry is internal and voluntary. It places your body on red alert:

• Muscles tense
• Digestion slows
• Heart rate and blood pressure rise
• Adrenaline spikes
• You lose sleep, focus, and peace

Your body thinks it’s in battle mode. But there’s no enemy. Chronic worriers stay on this battlefield for years—until their body breaks down.

Why We Worry

Worry can stem from love, fear, or habit. People say, “If you love someone, you worry about them.” But love doesn’t require mental telepathy. It asks for care and presence—not obsessing over things you can’t control.

The term “worrywart” makes sense. Left unchecked, worry grows and consumes. Like a wart on the body, it starts small but can overtake everything.

How to Squash the Worrywart

1. Recognize What Worry Is

Worry is a thought loop aimed at controlling the uncontrollable. You’re trying to predict, prevent, or fix something—often using nothing but mental energy.

2. Acknowledge You’re Not Telepathic

You cannot control life, death, illness, or other people’s decisions by thinking hard enough. No one can. And that’s okay.

3. Tune into Your Warning Signs

Your body gives you early alerts—like a ship moving from green to yellow to red alert. Ask yourself:

• Are my thoughts racing?
• Do I feel tense or sick?
• Am I imagining worst-case scenarios?

Name it: “I’m worrying.” Awareness breaks the cycle.

4. Ask: Can I Control This?

If the answer is no, accept that. Letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care—it means you’re reclaiming energy for what is within your power.

5. Turn Worry into Work

✦ Prayer or Reflection

Prayer isn’t worry—it’s surrender. It can offer peace and perspective. If prayer’s not your thing, mindful reflection or meditation works too.

✦ Redirect Your Thoughts

Change your environment: get up, move around, talk to someone, take a walk, or do something tactile. Worry often fades when we shift context.

✦ Focus Your Mental Beam

Engage in hobbies or tasks that require concentration—baking, puzzles, gardening, music. Focus crowds out worry.

✦ Move Your Body

Physical activity releases stress. You don’t need a gym membership. Dance in your kitchen, walk the dog, clean the garage. Use that fight-or-flight energy productively.

✦ Get Involved

Channel worry into action:

• Concerned about health? Research and prepare.
• Afraid of crime? Join a community initiative.
• Overwhelmed by a deadline? Learn time management or ask for help.

The Energy Shift

“I wish I had her energy—I feel so drained.”
She may not have more energy, just fewer leaks. Chronic worry is an energy drain. When you stop trying to control what you can’t, that energy returns. You feel lighter. Healthier. Calmer.

Bottom Line?

Worry is optional. Learned behavior can be unlearned. Stop rehearsing disaster. Step away from the red alert. Reclaim your body, mind, and peace. It’s never too late to squash the worry wart.